My bestfriend found my old stuff in his closet. And by old stuff I mean old notebooks and journals. He gave it back to me last week when I was down and having one of the biggest crying fit of my life. He said, “It amazes me, you have been blogging since you were a little girl, but only in paper”.
It gave me a new perspective. Or I would rather call it an inspiration. Somehow, reading my old writings sparks hope and inspiration within. It makes me want to explore and play and be young again.
Yeah I know I’m still young. But really, let’s all be honest here. Life has changed a lot for me, and for everyone who have actually grown up some years. My concerns now are the likes of that of an adult. Unlike before when my problems would only include difficult math problems, creative art projects, school paper deadlines, asking permission for prom nights and the occasional young heartaches. Now, I have to worry if I’m still gonna have my job the next morning I wake up. I have to manage finances, save for the rainy days, plan the future. Also, I need to keep my relationships healthy – with my mom, boyfriend, bestfriend, friends, colleague, and most especially with God.
And yeah, that’s a lot to worry about in a day. Not to mention your day job causes you a lot of pain (in the ass and in the heart) and would not even pay you the sum that would equals its demand, and your boyfriend has this habit of breaking up with you every month.
But if you think about it, if you really try to think hard about all the things you have been worrying about, then suddenly everything comes to oblivion — suddenly, everything seems to not make any sense at all. The worrying and the agony, and everything — it does not make any sense at all.
So suddenly we all realize that what would really make sense from here is how we can actually make sense out of those nonsensical everyday trivialities.
